She could have loved
the twins dearly had they let her, and day by day, in the absence of
the mother, she had been accustomed to nurse, she had even
positively enjoyed 'petting' Mrs. Gaddesden, holding her wool for
her, seeing to her hot-water bottles, and her breakfast in bed.
Pamela in love with Arthur Chicksands! And she remembered that a
faint idea of it had once crossed her mind, only to be entirely
dismissed and forgotten.
'But I ought to have seen--I ought to have known! Am I really a
vampire?'
And she remembered how she, in her first youth, had suffered from
the dominance and the accomplishment of older women; women who gave
a girl no chance, who must have all the admiration, and all the
opportunities, who would coolly and cruelly snatch a girl's lover
from her.
'And that's how I've appeared to Pamela!' thought Elizabeth between
laughing and crying. 'Yet all I did was to talk about ash for
aeroplanes! Oh, you poor child--you poor child!'
She seemed to feel Pamela's pain in her own heart--she who had had
love and lost it.
Pages:
389
390
391
392
393
394
395
396
397
398
399
400
401
402
403
404
405
406
407
408
409
410
411
412
413