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Trollope, Anthony, 1815-1882

"Phineas Finn The Irish Member"

I live much alone; but you are always with me.
Should you marry any other man, it will be the same with me still. If
you refuse me now I shall go away,--and live wildly."
"Oswald, what do you mean?"
"I mean that I will go to some distant part of the world, where I
may be killed or live a life of adventure. But I shall do so simply
in despair. It will not be that I do not know how much better and
greater should be the life at home of a man in my position."
"Then do not talk of going."
"I cannot stay. You will acknowledge, Violet, that I have never lied
to you. I am thinking of you day and night. The more indifferent you
show yourself to me, the more I love you. Violet, try to love me." He
came up to her, and took her by both her hands, and tears were in his
eyes. "Say you will try to love me."
"It is not that," said Violet, looking away, but still leaving her
hands with him.
"It is not what, dear?"
"What you call,--trying."
"It is that you do not wish to try?"
"Oswald, you are so violent, so headstrong. I am afraid of you,--as
is everybody. Why have you not written to your father, as we have
asked you?"
"I will write to him instantly, now, before I leave the room, and
you shall dictate the letter to him. By heavens, you shall!" He had
dropped her hands when she called him violent; but now he took them
again, and still she permitted it.


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