Hereupon we recovered our spirits, and the Doctor, approaching the
Mummy with great dignity, desired it to say candidly, upon its honor
as a gentleman, if the Egyptians had comprehended, at any period,
the manufacture of either Ponnonner's lozenges or Brandreth's pills.
We looked, with profound anxiety, for an answer- but in vain. It was
not forthcoming. The Egyptian blushed and hung down his head. Never
was triumph more consummate; never was defeat borne with so ill a
grace. Indeed, I could not endure the spectacle of the poor Mummy's
mortification. I reached my hat, bowed to him stiffly, and took leave.
Upon getting home I found it past four o'clock, and went immediately
to bed. It is now ten A.M. I have been up since seven, penning these
memoranda for the benefit of my family and of mankind. The former I
shall behold no more. My wife is a shrew. The truth is, I am
heartily sick of this life and of the nineteenth century in general. I
am convinced that every thing is going wrong. Besides, I am anxious to
know who will be President in 2045. As soon, therefore, as I shave and
swallow a cup of coffee, I shall just step over to Ponnonner's and get
embalmed for a couple of hundred years.
THE END
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